When I first seriously thought about starting Lambchopssocks, I sort of imagined a life filled with colour and opportunity and lots of happy socks. While all of that has proven true, working for yourself is not as romantic as the internet makes it out to be.
Yes, I get to sleep in, but there are just as many sleepless nights spent worrying and designing and counting and emailing. I had owned a few businesses before, so I thought I knew what I was doing, but an online business was a complete mystery tome. The first few months were spent in an eruption of excitement and self-doubt. But after all the kinks (and colourful socks) were ironed out, I found my groove and my foot-shaped hole in the world.
I am my own boss. I am my own assistant, accountant, designer, chairman, social researcher and media person. Saying this out loud (and writing it down and publishing it) has allowed me to realise what a pleasure and a challenge the past two years have been. I get to make the final call on every executive decision, and I believe that changing the language we use has the power to change a situation.
I get to make those decisions, I get to spend hours working with colours and patterns and shapes. I get to work in my pyjamas. I get to stand up for 40 hours straight at a weekend market.
Understanding the privilege of working for myself means I now have a shit-tonne of self-respect, and respect for all of those small business owners who came before me.
No one tells you that the freedom is incredibly liberating, but nor do they tell you that it is incredibly daunting, and EVERYTHING is riding on you. Starting from the bottom while always looking for the top is exhausting, and my neck is sore. But I wouldn't change a thing.
Everything that encompasses Lambchopsocks, encompasses me. My imagination wanders, and it’s allowed to! In fact, daydreaming is encouraged in my office. As are G ’n’ T’s.
“Follow your dreams!”
“Don’t quit your day job!”
With these sorts of contradicting sayings ringing loud, to say I was confused is a bit of an understatement. Conflicting information is everywhere you look these days. Only wear black, but always wear pink. Speak your mind, but don't say too much. Take lots of selfies, but just enjoy the moment and put your phone down. So to say “f*@! it” and do whatever I wanted was, and still is, liberating.
The choices we make everyday amount to how we get to define our lives. We make over 35,000 choices every single day, about our clothes and our words, our regrets and our dreams. If we dream too big, we’re told we might regret it. But if we don't dream, won’t we regret that more?
I know I would, so I felt the fear and did it anyway.